Conflict produces opportunities for growth
Always remembered will be the day that a written letter read aloud guided me through a tough conversation with a boss.
Tension lingered between us. Unknown to me was the reason why. Other scenarios baffled and angered me, leaving me in a rage of confusion with one foot turned towards the door for other options.
Not knowing where else to go with the confusion and anger wrapped around a desire to merely love what I do and do it with kickass quality, I reached out to mentors. Wisdom came like a boomerang reward. Suggestions included: talk it out, communicate, write out your concerns, be objective and specific, avoid “you” messages, get clear about what you want, own your side, clarify and discern intentions, be compassionate, ask for time to talk in a place that is NOT the office.
Follow these suggestions, I did. And what resulted was one of the most pivotal and memorable career moments leaving behind a lingering scent of hope for what can come of conflict and the ability to dance through it.
Questions were answered. Misunderstandings were not only evident, but appeared to be forgiven. Clarity rose. Relief swelled. Perfection has been bypassed... on purpose.
Had this been a “perfect” position or relationship, I would have never been given the opportunity to grow skills of communication, clarity, advocacy, confidence and professionalism. Moving forward with these recently polished skills, a stronger and clearer purpose have rallied energy that was previously and heavily covered by anger, confusion, resentment and ambiguity.
Amidst it all, inspiration for specific program development sprouted right up, despite the previous covering. Leaves me even more devoted to suggesting and following these ideas (that I do not claim to be my own): be who you are, be where you are, and embrace your truth... with compassion and clear communication, include those most near to you who are part of the concern and listen to understand their perspective.
Just for today: What does it feel like to be where you are? If there is a feeling of being blocked, who could you talk to about ideas for unearthing possibilities or at least addressing the specific concerns? How willing are you to move into the truth?
You deserve hope. And welcome to perhaps your first step of it, or high-fives if you’re already livin’ in it.